tell an army man when he's had enough to drink! There was one thing left to do before midnight: Waste more time on Folding Story or get back to my incisive Nu Pogodi slash fiction.

The bloated orange baby was having another temper tantrum; Rosanne, similarly bloated from water retention, had a hot flash so bad it left her incontinent. "Retards!" Trump yapped.

Here's Johnny tonight / Muscular Dystrophy beer / This Alpo tastes good. People quoted the zine's haiku on the playgrounds, but mold spores at the Chinese printing plant spread to

who were into self-degradation over their own privilege. This bored the lamb so much that it begged Mary to put him into the stew, but there was no room, due to all the quinoa. So

fell from Fluffy's pink eyes and salted his roasted carrot, which only made it taste all the better. "Don't cry," Gibber said kindly, "It'll ruin your diet." Zetawilk looked up

say, but kept its mummified lips still, knowing that they would crumble if it pointed out the suspicious shoes. So it kept mum. The MHPD detective found fingerprints on the golden

fluffy bunny hides. Sanjiro "Bloody Eyes" strode out of the Bunny Gang's hutch. The Owl Gang fell for the bunny-clone bait, and now his gang would have their revenge. He spat his

the first feline to be elected Mayor of Barack, Omaha. This was not only because he could talk and was smarter than the citizens, but most thought that since his name was Fido, he

over my bathroom threshold, when it hits me like a bag of Fritos, right between the eyes…why didn’t I see it sooner? Everyone is affected, infected or not. Everyone itches at 4:15

Dance Hall would have a special musical nose-hair climbing competition, and Vanessa would put special bows on her nose hair that concealed spikes, to discourage merely athletic

Pachouli was miffed that she'd not been cast. She and sandalwood went way back. They'd been in a few bags together. Sometimes there was a third or fourth. Myrrh and frankincense.

exploded all the C4 plastic surrounding the tiny bank's back door, then into it's tiny plastic vault. But the tiny Indian and Small Soldiers found little money there. So they

Role model for a 4 year old Cleopatra Ptolemy. "Ask not what The Gods of Egypt have done for you, ask what can you do for The Gods of Egypt." Or, "We do this not because it is easy

to be seen, so Bunny sidled up to the rampion. It's purple flowers nodded in the breeze. Bunny glanced around one more time for the bald man before grabbing the rampion by the root

Still unable to explain their mistaken identity, Pichard placated the Ghonadian Ambassador with naked lady drawings with nude mammaries, which were in the Enterprise's database.

ing cars and giving them tickets. It was a Truth Support Group awareness gesture. "Razzmatazz! That ain't your run-of-the-mill regicide here in Swamp Poker Swings," said Hebetha.

Maize fiddled with the field radio until the colonel's voice came in loud and clear, just so Candy could switch it off again. By now, the elephant had led his tribe in a stampede

night where his name came from because it sounded like a Liontaur name. He told me he was orphaned on the streets of Tarna, but with the help of a talking mop and a damp squid, he

was popular with the serial killers that comprise 4chan. Regrettably, the animal abuse website came up when he did a search for "naked men lying on faux fur rugs". Because Google.

It was a good thing Elsa was on board the train. She single-breathedly got the train running. In fact, it ran so well that she had to stop breathing lest she send us into the