"Hahahahahahahaaaaa! Oh you are funny, Darren. Hah. Really. Thanks for that, pal. This is going to make killing you so much easier." He wiped a tear forming on his cheek & clicked

"Very well, Hubert. Are you ready to catch the hare today, m'boy?" He stared at me with eyes that said " You rotten bipedal ape, I'm the master of this and any damn fool racetrack!

Hmmmm, a tasty brew. Yes, might fine it was. In fact, in all of Spigelton, I've never had such a lemonade, nor from anywhere else, really, like this one. 28 & a quarteryear and it

"Yes, hello there. Hello I say. This is Captain Sterling P. Mutinia here, sir. I say, your connection is quite a clicky clicky. Are you there, man? Speak up! Oh, phooey on this

to the sliding doors, expecting to be hit with a wave of cheers and triumphant music from within...but instead of the fanfare, it was eerily casual in there. Business as usual for

You look afraid now. Are you really that scared of your parents? What's the worst they're gonna do, ground you? Hah, that's pathetic. Where's your zealous attitude gone?

Yes, indeed: Jeff Lynne, the English songwriter, singer, record producer, and multi-instrumentalist who co-founded the rock band Electric Light Orchestra. His doom approached,

Senator Jones motioned for all congressmen to wear obligatory adult diapers to stop the flow. Once the bill was passed, the crap stream slowed for a few weeks. But soon enough,

people think that I'm some sort of monster. Nothing could be further from the truth. Okay, sure, I enjoy scaring campers, but that's just what I do. It's not malicious.

a way to speak louder than rhyming words and often had a quicker turnaround. "Put your arm up here...sweetheart."

"Gossipmonger of all my self-indulgent fantasies, please bare me your shame to X-rated fame, just as I have wished for myself indubitable climax," Masters told Johnson and Johnson

However Frank found the rest of the second graders to be poor recruits.

I took a hessian sack from the boot of my car and loaded the pieces evidence in. However, where there's cutlery, there's crockery. I set about searching for a giveaway plate.

had found that pale foundation. "Mr. James, sir," I said shyly. He looked at me warmly, but the creepy make-up ruined the effect. "Um, where did you buy your cool make-up?"

prevent him from proclaiming his method of nostril hair removal was superior to all others. Jerry found himself so inspired by his own genius that he decided to go into business.

ted storming towards him, a metaphorical thundercloud brewing above his head. The mime caught sight of the hardened glint in Ben's eyes and mimed getting into a car. Ben strode

Unfortunately, anyone who accepts free van candy does not possess the sharpest reasoning ability. Once she let her guard down the virus leapt at her, slobbering for her flesh.

But other times it doesn’t because even if I’m not a creative at least I’m not undead like my sister Illene. I don’t think I am actually going to get the kids tomorrow night becaus

k to where they shouldn't have been in the eleventh hour. But they were and it was. But every memory only has so much cohesion to make it distinct and not an iota more. When cohesi

Then he realized, zombies wouldn't notice if he wore the same underwear for a week, or a month. He'd always wanted to have roommates. Zombies would be great roommates. His yoghurt