It's a killer, taking lives, breaking hearts, and bleeding into you slowly. Mostly, it breaks you, causing you to forget who you really are.

-nothing mattered, and yet everything was important. The universe made some sense at last.

Maybe he could have loved her, once upon a time. But then she died, and he had no choice.

s actually tofu flavored with half a dozen chemicals (and some blood, sweat, and vegetarian tears). But I just smiled at the cop and watched him enjoy the sweet, sweet lie. I'm a

hether a professional vasectomy was absolutely necessary. I'll never know, cuz the cactus got me in the wazoo instead. "We'll pull 'em out one by one, " said the old hag in the ER.

"How to Contact Foldingstory Management Without Consulting Interpol", but the math on pg. 7629 & the entire 36th chapter remained incomprehensible. No, if I want to delete CBethM,

The exuberance & optimism of youth will tide them over until they're old & wrinkled, their old folds & creases will give them patina & when they finally premiere in completed stori

The Shmantis. I read to my children of a planet called "Earth," in which there are no Shmantis-people guarding their homes - where there is no darkness, and no evil - and no

, but instead it gained the likes of Martin Luther King. February, what a show-off, got all of the love of Valentines Day as well as the Chinese New Year- even March was jealous!

on a stampede? Imagine the devastation of a herd of Brontosaurus! But noone listened to the neanderthal who was his own hairsuit & soon cromagnon cowboys were slash-and-burning

with her furnishings & attire so lavishly adorned in sable, stole & fur, you couldn't tell a yeti from the fleece. I bet the sass queen uses the old Wooly Booger as a foot rug.

s. The mutterings of a fecally fettered sage are most revealing." "Would you take me on as pampered pupil, O Master Po? To Teach in the ways of the supersorbent cloth?"

Mr. Genie shrugged & wriggled his nose. A huge tantalizing sandwich materialized. The maid grabbed it greedily. She bit down on a mouthful..SNAP! "Imbecile! Why the Rice Krispies?!

"What did you get for valentines day, Billy?" Billy looked at me with a fire in his eyes. He puffed his chest and screamed, "I GAINED THE LOVE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! NOW PRAISE ME."

Jared sneered, "Hey man, we all know that the cringy byakugan sharingan is nO matcH for the jedi ultra powers. Bill says that the pokemon will beat your cards- but I disagree-

who is the most k a w a i i geeyowuh person you know

La mujer miró al hombre. Ella lloró y dijo: "si eso es bueno a tú, entonces adiós... Ignacio. Tú eras mi mejor uña hasta ahora. Disfruta ser un martillo." Entonces la mujer corrió

As your president, I John Thomas Willy P. Tallywacker will elminiate obfuscation, double-talk and all manner of euphemism. Not a Peter, but a self-erecting drainage unit! Not a

As any great comedian would tell you, true humor is the suffering of someone else.

never had any luck dating unless it was the middle of winter, and only after he mentioned he happened to own a hot tub.