It was also where it ended when my teacher lost it. "So you know that Gilbert Grape was my brother & our mom ate him. You're wondering if, maybe, I also took a bite. I don't know."

"No Sir, you are mistaken, my name is Frank Gordon, not Gordon Frank. I have never been in Juvey Hall, I've never had an aneurysm & I've fathered no 6 children with that woman."

I was taking a shower when i forgot how to take a shower, again. Which reminds me, that last time I characterized it as being "in the middle of the shower". I just want to clarify,

? Donate what you'd like if you were in my socks like a can a roast beef & a decent pair of shoes. If you don't wear Uggs anymore what makes you think I'd be caught dead in them?

not to let one rip while the "No Farting" sign is lit- those ejecting seats are sensitive. There went vlight attendant Stebe -no worry he has a barachute- to debonstrate this. If a

tirred my blanket. Casper looked forelorn. "Can you forgive me for the revenge I must wreck among the living. Only then can I rest." "Who?" I asked.

if it just survives the Raidiation. A cockroach seems an odd avatar to occupy, but afforded me many advantages. I ran across grouchy Mrs. Snootley's foot as she stood atop a ladder

, but I believe you are not guilty! You, sir, are far too incompetent to have committed such a heinous crime." The Prime Minister smiled. Good, he thought. All was going

So I un-friendzoned her, and now she was happy thinking of herself as a member of my all-women friendzone group. Hmm... I opened her battery compartment. Sure enough, someone had

my brother Joe. We had repeated it at least six times by now - I never really learned how to count, so I couldn't tell. Renee laughed at us adult types, dumb as bricks among the

go along on. Like this one. The next time they were moving him from one purse into the other, he bit one of the hands that fed him, & jumped over the railing & into a military jeep

I looked at her and then at Deadeye then back at her. "If you're Lorena, I'm looking at my sister." Lorena snorted and started laughing. "Hey dad, you're a daddy again. Who were yo

retrieve the time machine that we're going to lose in the final fold of this story. This is where it will end up. Oh there it is. Careful with that axe Eugene. That time machine is

In the winter or 1414 my good husband, Percival Chanter, was bitten by Ambition, & in the furtherance of Politics, decided that he and I should attend a Christening of the Baron's

the threshold never shimmered but suddenly there was a herd of hyenas were running in through the front door, or what used to be the front door. My sister was dead behind the door.

Keep repeating it but make it yours, Keep repeating it but make it yours, Keep repeating it but make it yours, Keep repeating it but make it yours, Keep repeating it but make it

Julienne cut the silence."You don't need a stinking machete!" Awl the guests were on edge."What's the point?" thought Ginzu & yelled "Knife Fight" before grabbing Pixi's Paring kni

He dabbled in Missing Persons and one time juggled two Men Without Hats, one was a midget but not where it counted. Living in the Big Country he'd seen the English Beat do Orchest

But lately the cats living in the basement have noticed there are not as many bugs as there used to be in the basement. They suspect a new predator has moved into the basement with

"Why did you have your plan up in your ass", the little girl asked the wanna be Royal Tactician, Jester. "To demonstrate my wares as a tactician. I had contingency plans at the rea