ntly. It was tough being a vegan in a zombie apocalypse. If the Zombies, or Runners as we call them, don't eat me first, I will. I go out to the supermarket everyday, but

a haberdashery/bakery i discovered along a canal in Amsterdam. The haberdasher took three looks at my naan hat and set the guard dog upon me. I skedattled away through BeNeLux and

on the last fumes of demonry, but, before it weakly faded into oblivion, I sucked it into my hot, hungry lungs, and I instantly turned into a Super Mega Demon. I turned toward my

lagoon; which is to say, the end of the lagoon that glows a radioactive green. The alien frogs are organizing the indigenous frogs into a fuedal society. Day 17: War has come to

during the cakes and ale part of the ceremony. The Pagans raised their cone of power as the Evangelicals raised their hands to channel God Almighty in the suburban showdown. Taijo

macrame my mother's morbid mumblings in mauve muslin smothered in a soothing mossberger patterned meander. Three bananas & a carrot cured me of that in no time. No time indeed. How

was waiting with the doll house. It was the best she could for the moment. She'd been told "a man of small stature". Amagenta Louise knew she'd underestimated how big "small" was.

the best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Too many children ate too many snacks in too short of time, which led to elongated naps, vomiting and farting. It wasn’t pretty.

I would then have applied the Frosty to the orange plastic chair right there at Wendy's, and then sat in it, presumably with a satisfying hiss of steam. But I was not that tactful.

dream of you to think of that morning you you might have went jogging beside Ted Bundy and he didn't give you a second look. Relieved? What does a 12 year old have that I don't?

seemed I pointed out my Georgia O'Keeffes. I mentioned feeling moist and then I fainted. I awoke from the 1st dream into the 3rd dream & into the arms of Cecil B. Deville, close up

gave off an acrid smell that reminded Mother Nature of her youth. When she took a nascent world and forged a self-sustaining biosphere that has lasted ages. The astro-turf reminded

Mikolaj spent most of his day at the park watching the ducks on the pond. He rarely gave a thought to being the last survivor of the Royal Calump Empire. Or that he had an ex-wife.

"Well, EXCUUUUUUSE ME, Prince of Dark-- I mean, Skipper!" The pentagram on the floor started glowing red, even though the summoner and the devil were still arguing with each other

several more years, until I had published my fourth book, entitled: 'I Can't Read My Own Writing'. I blamed mu illiteracy on the Dancing Plague, as I had not been able to sit still

, which was cruel of the Bureaucracy because everyone knows that in 1997 ShopRite did not carry gorgonzola. They claimed it contained gorgons. So he returned to the future empty

-down two-timimng monster that she was. But Megumi's lust for Godzilla went unrequited, for Godzilla had been rendered sterile by the same radiation that had made him gigantic.

puffing because of my cadaverous coffee breath. It's cool Hammy stays on one side of my mouth 'cause it makes me look like a hamster. Mom also doesn't know I eat the hamster wafers

He rained down on the gangster like a rhino in a tutu factory. Up until he discovered that the umbrella has distracted his attention from the shotgun the gangster was holding.

Though, he thought he was in private, he noticed he was being watched. Removing his arm from his mouth, blood dripping. He decided to make his first move. He walked over to..