Maize fiddled with the field radio until the colonel's voice came in loud and clear, just so Candy could switch it off again. By now, the elephant had led his tribe in a stampede

Dance Hall would have a special musical nose-hair climbing competition, and Vanessa would put special bows on her nose hair that concealed spikes, to discourage merely athletic

the first feline to be elected Mayor of Barack, Omaha. This was not only because he could talk and was smarter than the citizens, but most thought that since his name was Fido, he

fell from Fluffy's pink eyes and salted his roasted carrot, which only made it taste all the better. "Don't cry," Gibber said kindly, "It'll ruin your diet." Zetawilk looked up

tell an army man when he's had enough to drink! There was one thing left to do before midnight: Waste more time on Folding Story or get back to my incisive Nu Pogodi slash fiction.

-lause, frightened by the loud noises. The SEC had to fend off throngs of Vegan protestors to investigate Granny's sausage factory, and discovered they secretly contained no meat.

"Who can insert the sharpest object into Eminem's ear canals?" Not that his ability to hear had ever come into play in his life before, as his career evidenced. We freed his prison

with that he spun the ship back around, so the dead one could be buried in his place of birth. But Neptune had other ideas. The great sea god had no intention of honoring the

but when you're near me, I'm in the Mood for Love". "OMG! Take off that witch's face, Susan," I scolded my little rat friend, "before you accidentally cast a spell!" Just then, a

that? A padded seat? Dr. Singh's patients started to refer to him as "Irritable Collin", which of course, made things worse. His receptionist, Hilda, got into the habit of ducking

be able to pound out the dent in hr forehead plate with a rubber mallet. This, she hoped, would stop the Neptunal transmissions, but it only gave her a headache. Incoming messages

from selling and baking. Though he loved Betty Crocker, his reading ability was that of a child. And followed the instruction of Dr. Seuss's Green Eggs and Ham. He had trouble and

explosions of my skull. If I did, I wouldn't have paid so highly for them. I determined to be the next skeezy siphilitic heroin addict like my hero, Alastair Crowley, so I snorted

Bear Grylls climbed outside the box (it was a box ski lift, see...) and severed the connection to the cable. The ski lift box fell onto the icy slope and slid at a terrifying speed

circumnavigate the surmounting glitches piling on FoldingStory, but he knew a sad solution to bring back their absent admins. Dare he sacrifice himself by violating the rules? All

time to spank that damn monkey. He’d be better off keeping in touch with himself. A parfait without layers is just creamed aspic. Keep that orangutan away from your Cool Whip!

the his office was always full of blood. When they looked closer they noticed that the VP was a bit more two dimensional than they were used to. Gordo discovered it was a picture.

"I'm fine," the robot called to Phil from the kitchen, but he could hear more things shattering in there. "Never mind," Phil said, "I'll do the dishes." The robot laughed secretly

who knew how to lead a dancer with two left hooves. Kaitlyn and Mr. Ed took up quite a portion of the floor (especially Mr. Ed), and he whispered sweet nothings into her ear over

Yes, Folding Story will keep you occupied, bewildered, and chortling until you need you to change your pants. Studies show that repeated chortling strengthens the abdominal mucles