"Sorry about that, sir. I was just practicing and you seemed to sneak through out of nowhere. As for the object of your pursuit: I happen to know her, and you are unlikely to find

Shoe Angel, or a Shangel as the Old Masters had called them. Finally, I had completed my training, and now I could fly using my shoes which were

, unknowingly opening a tiny gap through which passed approximately 3 million bacteria directly from Mrs. Johnson's infected esophagus into my perfectly welcoming nasal passage.

forego buying armor this semester to pay the ridiculous tuition. He knew he could cover the lack by wearing a glamour. Uriah found he had been assigned to an acolyte who was adept

He needs that as a supplement to his recovery. He may heal faster if he has her love.

"When the tornado hit," I recounted "I was able to survive by getting into my Fiat 500 and driving." Most people found it hard to believe but I didn't want to out drive the tornado

#20. Dance like nobody's filming you with their smartphone. #21. Nap whenever the chance presents itself. #22. Always say 'please' and 'thank you' to the people who pay you. #23

the Rhino Judge, slapped the baboon bailiff, and crashed through the window out into a crowded street. Disoriented, he didn't notice

Then the trombone and trumpet players joined in the chorus, followed by French horns. A yak was the producer of the session at the Yak recording studios, state-of-the-art. Famously

Fiona turned off the television and knew who she had to call. "I will find allergy relief!" she exclaimed. She found her way to the kitchen to start some tea with honey.

-hew this sort of thing, claiming that it was 'the devil's wine spritzer', but dealornodeal would not let ashybear leave the party without one little taste. She glowered at him and

bis was working more effectively than Dre had hoped, but instead of incapacitating the cannibal, it was just making him even more hungry. "Excuse me, I have to pee," Dre told the

"Of course it is." Beck sighed. He was used to fate messing with him like this. After all, it isn't often that your ex is nice to you. Just so happened that his ex wove his fate.

He returned the gesture with a toothless grin, which immediately stole my heart. I ran across the room into Professor Plum's arms. Despite his age he caught me easily.

due to my dreadfully low self esteem and poor taste in people. I blamed this, of course, on the Panoptica drops I put in my eyes every night before bed. They always gave me dreams

"WWCD?" he thought, tumbling in slow motion to the floor from the pickle slippage debacle. "What Would Clausen Do?" he repeated. "Ah-ha!" Brilliance had struck. "Snap!"

But I, being a card-carrying member of the Humane Society of Peach Pit, Nebraska, refused to kill the dog. "Well, just neglect me, at least," the dog's eyes pleaded, but I refused.

", the something said in her mind. On the edge of a panic she tried to think of some spell or mudra, or mane padme om mane padme om... The something sighed in her mind but she didn

But when he got there the memory silence was brief as, not even 3 seconds in to getting there he started comparing the moments and in rushed the supporting memories with the rest t

to prehistoric times. My eyes locked at the bottom of the menu. A big red box with "DANGER" written in capitals. Perfect. "I'll have the Caveman Pizza. To go." I brusquely added.