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Brian the Confused Mail Clerk had no idea why his boss chose to hang a calendar of streakers in the office. He opened up an envelope. Inside was a neatly folded blank paper.
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from inside her chinchilla jacket as s/he posted Roger's bail. Until that moment, he had never realized how beautiful s/he was, even if those heels were so a bit much. Roger took
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created meat rations, so Master Splinter was counting on his restaurant's clientele to think it was just jargon on menu entrees such as Grub au Jus. (It was actually grubs.) Or
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Bobby had a timetable worked out for when he took over dominion of the dark side. Cthulhu & the other Old Ones had let the survivors turn the world against them while they slept.
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ripped the outhouse off its feet, and the ferocious high-speed projectile Booboo spawned was enough to ignite the fuel to the speeding car, which resulted in another explosion. "Uh
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"Well, I think it comes down to how much of a bitch you want to come off as on your first day at a new job," her stylist suggested over Magnum bars. She poured ouzo from another mo
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knew they couldn't flee the country until his insurance paid out, and that meant not being tied with their patriarch's death. Mumbling in Mumbai, they disavowed Felipe's death had
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"HOW HIGH SIR," a young penguin behind him asked. Montgomery turned to look at the youngling. "I said "Quack" cadet. But I like the enthusiasm." Word came that two infiltrators had
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n enormous amount of bitcoin; enough for Dr. Goodfeel to take Nurse Ratched for a ride on his hobbyhorse, get her to invest in Poxagone, give the Poxariffic some free advertising.
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proper acting technique?!" thundered Scorsese at the cowering shark,"We don't pay you to chat the actors up, we pay you to CHEW them up!" The chastened shark bared its teeth at me
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the Royal Canadian Mounties arrested me for being drunk and disorderly; when, in fact, I had forced a Siamese cat on Burton Cummings, at gun point. The ASPCA Officers cuffed me and
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But Ralph S. Mouse was so tiny that no-one really noticed the spray of bullets. Lefty the Wart heard Ralph's faint expletives and swatted at what he assumed was a flea on his ankle
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She walked into the pitch meeting with Solange the puppet Orange. The suits at Tropicana were cool to the idea. She got flustered. She was losing them. Then Solange spoke up. Heads
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and it was a perilous state to be in, yet she found herself laughing, throwing her arms in the air. Fern stared at Julia, knowing what little care she had was lost to the winds.
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...Maybe? Another look at the scattered archives might’ve sparked a few thoughts — perhaps ‘Janitor Fists Boss Until Prolapse’ had some sort of artistic or intellectual merit
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for the knuckle sandwich I loaned him at Christmas dinner, but I'd just had a heavy lunch which might repeat itself all over his beloved suit. His mother had died in that suit.
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essence of the Promise Ring, the one ring that the One Ring™ couldn't control. They'd changed names to Becky and David, but the Promise Ring hid them from druglord Sauron best.
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The goat planet was dominated by the technologically advanced Nan civilization who had been on the cusp of space travel when the monkeys in spaceships appeared in orbit above them.
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scuttled unless she could find someone on eBay or Craigslist selling the Schwinn and would accept Green Stamps. Then one day there it was on the Facebook Marketplace. Miley booked
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did not do the trick. Shooed out by the clerk, he swept back into the quickie mart almost instantaneously. He reached into the rolling hot dog racks and got his fingers stuck!