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chicken-like being hardly seemed dazed. Not much. He weebled & wobbled a bit but it seemed to find it pleasurable. It made a pink furry purrr. We all heard it in our minds, not our
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n enormous amount of bitcoin; enough for Dr. Goodfeel to take Nurse Ratched for a ride on his hobbyhorse, get her to invest in Poxagone, give the Poxariffic some free advertising.
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chose the expensive option of granite. I mean, I would love to make lead into gold. I could finally turn the southern mine fields into riches and build and amass an army to
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slightest perturbed by Nyarlathotep. We all pointed and laughed at him. One guy quipped, "He wanted to reject Cthulhu, but said, '$20 is $20 is $20 is $20 is $20 is $20 is $20!'"
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on their heads and showing off for Mrs. Lem, who looked away, unimpressed. "Why don't you gentlemen, police and Charlie Sheens all go jump off a cliff," she suggested. With that
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proper acting technique?!" thundered Scorsese at the cowering shark,"We don't pay you to chat the actors up, we pay you to CHEW them up!" The chastened shark bared its teeth at me
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both of them ignoring the scent of a dead skunk I left in the radiator last Yom Kippur. Even Dairy Queen won't take their drive-thru order now.
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his unwritten folding stories spilled out intent on finding a new writer so that they'd see the dark of night. Which is how we ended up in these dungeons under the profaned church.
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e and into the baptismal font which, like the public pool, was full of urine. Then the best man got loose and ate all the little communion wafers (the Jeez-its), and the bride ate
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He then engaged the four grannies in a laborious flashback to his time panning for ice in the Martian boonies. Then he was hit by a golf cart going at 2 kph. WHY ARE YOU MEOWING
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the flange motor 'til he outward belt twanged out. "Hah! Take that, ass-bag! I triumph over technology again!" So he thought, but the propeller chipped his peg leg somethin' fierce
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I felt like my own private trinity in an Ang movie. I had one hand reaching for Jesus and the other my nana. Jesus had one reaching for me & the other pushing my nana behind him.
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is sweet on me and she gives me and my friends extra tofu on all their orders," Bob explained. He half stood, caught the eye of said girl at the counter, & gave her 2 finger guns.
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a cat beer because so few cats live to be 21. That didn't mean the cat couldn't learn, and the cat ended up ordering 200 gross of frozen lasagnas with my good, clean credit card.
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not without a hint of snideness. He gestured at the children at play. "Perhaps my tune is more to the liking of yon children. I tire of always being alone with the rats." He blew
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and it was a perilous state to be in, yet she found herself laughing, throwing her arms in the air. Fern stared at Julia, knowing what little care she had was lost to the winds.
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My friends insisted that having a neck caved in by necrosis worked for me. It brought out my bone structure, they said. My mom complained that I was costing her enough in concealer
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-ated by. M. Popeye, dropped & blew his pipe. The blow turned into a fog horn; alerting the Gendarmerie. M. Popeye caught the pipe & used it to reach Pierre's corpse in the Seinne
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Store & yanked the cashier away from her Behind the Scenes TIKTOK session; he bent over, showing her, & her TIKTOK audience, his torn pants & his full moon in all its hairy glory.
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Vomit was my companion tonight. The acid in my throat kept me awake. A cobra on my right arm would have been rad. All in black and white. But now that she was pregnant.