Instead of Cossacks running the citizenry down we'll get methed up rednecks in big trucks who don't know a lick of Russian, yet. No Red Dawn needed this time. They had the orange

It turns out that when you're dead pushing up daisies makes sense. It gives the dead something to do. Makes them feel like they're still part of the circle of life. Boredom is the

Right about now is when Vice President Pence and Mother should make their move. He'll never be President now. Unless he invokes the 25th Amendment & saves the nation from a madman.

I think the dead smell is coming from me. I guess that demon got me. But I canceled him out. Oh well, maybe I’ll finally get some rest. I’ll let somebody else a raize hell.

I got a job running dirty laundry from a restaurant in Manhattan, Uncle Joey’s Pasta e Fagioli, to a well-respected Industrial Cleaning Facility in South Hackensack, New Jersey.

And then somehow the mysteries of my provenance, the travails I had endured, and the stupidities of the present day all resolved themselves into

Eridani Neruda, grandson of Captain Nemo, let the remaining human crew off the Nautilus during Ibiza's off-season, then got far away from the topside crazies. Under the sea

I put the email in Chaz's spam folder. Actually, I printed it out using a sensible font on reasonably priced paper, put it in a manila folder, and whirled it into his in-basket.

"Now look, you. Don't try to rope me into your twisted cosmoconception re: sick monkeys infected with fictions, because for one thing I'm not wearing monkey meat." Angus Chatterton

Prof. Jentelbert detected strange signals coming from large networks of mycelium. The shrooms are up to something and Prof. J, after taking numerous shrooms, have decoded their pla

You need to cell your sole two the Autocorrect Deity too please them. Dunt fourr get tu maik a sakrifise too da Speling Soul. Lastly. Grammar God please please the to be good luc

The labels are still pending. I've been touched since the day I was born. I didn't know any different. I always assumed other people's experiences were similar to my own. When they

I finally convinced me that I was me. Me doesn't know that I'm not really me. Bwahaa haa hah hah.

The Rule of thumb was thems with thumbs ruled. Charlie and his kind thought they could get by by taking the thumbs of others. Sorry Charlie. Purloined thumbs don’t make a tuna king

The barista asked its name. "I'd better write it myself," it said. The barista shook her head. "No way I can pronounce that." It replied, "Could be good in a way, because otherwise

So yeah, that was me who edited Covid-19 to kill all the stupid people -- it's all in the doxxes. But that was just for my personal convenience. Where we go from here is not for me

So many people writing "young adult" novels about overthrowing the system, whereas I try to reach a younger audience with a watercolor cat version of "Notes from Underground." It's

"Dancing yes, but fiction no! Not ever! Those mind-twisting, addictive contrivances? Never! And as for cinema and teleplays with their calculated neurosnares -- burn them all!"

Birth is a crap shoot: will you be tall or short? Will you forever spend your time on Earth in a fog? Mesmerized? Brought to order by the Dictator and his fearmongering propaganda?

You’ve been blessed with amazing genes: your classically chiseled exudes beauty, friendliness…She looked at herself in the mirror. “There isn’t anything special about my Jeans