the voluminous silouette. So I followed the Puffy Pantalooneers around with my head hung in slight shame. I hoped no one would notice how I didn't fit in. My jeggings were embarras

and corporate team-building events. Everyone wanted their own telescopic robot MAN'S UNIT. It became the hottest product to hit the shelves since the redesigned Easy-Bake Oven.

summarily blacklisted from ever working in the entire cosmetics industry again, as well as most food service chains. I hate life and all the piddling weevils that infect it. I like

-analyzed and found to be of sound body only, and even then, just barely. But by then, his Super Happy Smile Family Togetherness Campaign had earned Mao a dedicated following, not

perché Satre era un bastardo. Tradisce le carte e gioca con il cuore di una puzzola. La vita è come un puzzle, e al centro di essa ci sono parole che non si trovano nei libri.

real name, Gwen, again. So naturally he began eating fish whole, retching his head back and letting the slimy, fishy flesh sink into his avian esophagus. It was too warm in here.

several more years, until I had published my fourth book, entitled: 'I Can't Read My Own Writing'. I blamed mu illiteracy on the Dancing Plague, as I had not been able to sit still

, which was cruel of the Bureaucracy because everyone knows that in 1997 ShopRite did not carry gorgonzola. They claimed it contained gorgons. So he returned to the future empty

a total hoax, and sued us for each day they missed tanning. The judge decided, in our favor, that they were not paid for tanning days, just for being tan, which they could easily

But Susan Spoiler McNaysayer told Susan Walker-Runner that the sperm bank was not for rounding up future meals for cannibals. Infuriated, Susan Walker-Runner torched the clinic,

-bt, as so often is the case with Communism and ponies. So Minty, the little green pony toppled that statue of Lenin, which by this time had turned green, as well. The ponies were

from the potato, launching itself into the ether like a wish on a star. This was the safest way of voting twice in Flint, Michigan, and dammit, I just wanted to get away for once.

, a much cleaner alleyway than he had seen in the old town, an alleyway in which even Mary Tyler Moore would be proud to toss her tam-o-shanter. Here, even the rats washed their

stifle him with her traditional dolphin ways, and he bit a chunk out of her dorsal fin. That tore it. She knew she had to leave Dan that very night. While he slept, she swan out

scattered, refraining from breaking her fall. The old bitch was dead, but at least her cute kitties would not starve. Those cats would grow into super cats, adopting her mannerisms

tides and the Sugarbelles that Love Them, when an advertisement came on about four times telling him to watch Navel Crime Investigation...Show. So he changed the channel to see

couldn't see what he was stealing from the ghosts. He stole the ghost of Christmas Past's wallet and lost all of his spirit cash at the Casino of the Dead. "Dammit all to Heck!" he

it occur that to her that she was reason all her workplaces were getting burned down. It was clearly poltergeist activity. At 26 she was well outside the normal range for it but fu

We could see no problem in that statement. We moved along. This gets awkward when we try to talk while walking the walk of the talk, as it happens! Sorry, I got excited there.

my truck wouldn't start and my mayonnaise had gone off and nobody wanted to walk in my shoes. I wanted desparately to find a way out of this country-western song, but